Chocolate

Keto Love Bites (paleo. keto. vegan)

If you haven’t been hiding under a rock, you will have probably heard the term ‘keto’ being bandied about in health & fitness land. It’s the new black but it’s not a new concept. A Keto diet has been around for yonks and it’s been used therapeutically for treating obesity, epilepsy, diabetes, Alzheimers and many other conditions for a very long time. It’s basic premise is eating high fat &  very low carb kicking your body into ketosis where it will use your fat for fuel. Benefits  vary from person to person but  weight loss, blood sugar control, mental focus & clarity, and increased energy are generally seen. As EVERY body is different, the amount of carbohydrate you can tolerate before you are no longer in ketosis varies and it’s something that each individual needs to work out for themselves. Am I doing Keto? No. Do I generally eat a pretty high fat (healthy fats) and low-mod carb diet anyway? Yes. That feels good for me. Going super low carb (to be in ketosis) doesn’t feel great for me, I lack energy, my sleep suffers and my hormones go a bit wacky so, for me, making sure that I have a bit of fruit or some good starchy veggies as my carb sources works. Anyway, keto or not, these treats are a GREAT source of healthy fats and taste bloody tops. The fats will keep you satiated plus you feel like you are eating chocolate and that’s always a win in my book. Go forth and keto. Or don’t. You do you. 

3 tbs nut butter/coconut butter
1 tbs tahini

OPTIONAL- 3-4 drop peppermint or orange oil

1/4 cup coconut oil/butter/ghee/ cacao butter

1 tbs raw cacao
2 tbs collagen powder (or protein powder)

Melt together the nut butter, tahini & coconut oil, stir in everything else then spoon into chocolate moulds or pour into a baking paper lined tray. Pop it in the fridge to set for at least 4 hours.

** If you don’t give 2 hoots about being keto-friendly and need some sweetness you can add 1-2 tbs of raw honey, pure maple syrup or rice malt syrup if you fancy.

 

Blow Your Mind Peanut Butter Slice (primal. gluten free. dairy free)

Is it wrong to eat a whole slab of PB slice in one go? Asking for a friend. Obviously.

I’m not going to lie to you, if you are trying to lay off the treats right now this recipe is NOT for you. This gear is good. I mean mind-blowingly good. You won’t just eat one piece. I’d be impressed if you could eat less than 5 squares in a sitting. If I can give you a hot tip, which I can because it’s my blog, hide the finished product from yourself in the freezer. Behind the liver. Oh, you don’t have liver in your freezer? You should. That stuff has superpowers. Anyway, hide it, or you’ll see it when you open the fridge. Every time. And you’ll eat some. Every time. Then it will be gone in 12hrs. So I hear. My ‘friend’ told me.

Base
1/2 cup almonds (or nut/seed of your choice)
1/2 tsp cinnamon
15 fresh dates, seeds removed

Blend in a food processor until it comes together like a dough. Remove and press into a baking-paper lined tray. Set aside.

Filling
1/2 cup natural coconut milk yoghurt (or full fat coconut cream)
1/2 cup 100% peanut butter (or other type of nut/seed butter)
1/4 cup collagen hydrolysate (optional but amazing for skin, hair, nails & gut health)
Pinch salt

Mix all ingredients together well then pour over the base. Pop it in the freezer while you make the topping.

Topping
1/2 cup coconut oil, melted (you could use ghee, cacao butter or butter instead)
2 tbs raw cacao
1/4 cup rice malt syrup/honey/coconut nectar

Mix all ingredients until smooth, pour over the slice and pop back in the freezer for 2 hrs to set. Slice. Devour. Try to stop at one piece. That’s a dare.

pb-slice1

Almond & Maple Ice Cream (paleo. vegan. raw)

This day reminded me of Christmas Day, you know those days you feel like all you do is eat. Today I spent the day down the coast eating. I went out for breakfast, had coco whip in between & then an amazing seafood feast for lunch. I came home feeling full, sleepy & pretty sure that I was just going to by-pass dinner…. Thennnn I felt the urge to make ice cream, because there is always a separate stomach compartment for ice cream right? Well my stomach has that compartment, and one for sweet potato chips, I can put away A LOT of those things. So damn delicious. Anyone who tells you you can’t over-eat healthy food is a goddamn liar.

You can choose your own adventure with this ice cream a bit and swap the almond butter for a different type of nut butter. Cashew butter will give it a much more neutral flavour and something like peanut butter is going to give you a stronger flavour. Do what you want. Add in some of the optional extras, or don’t.

400ml coconut cream (full fat)
100ml water
3/4 cup almond butter                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           1/3- 1/2 cup maple syrup/ rice malt syrup (depending on how sweet you like it)                                                                                                                                                                                                                     Plus a few extra tbs maple syrup to drizzle                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         1 vanilla pod, scraped (or 1 tsp extract)

Optional-                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   Cacao nibs                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Shredded coconut                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             Goji berries                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Dark chocolate                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   Few shots of espresso

 

This can be done without an ice cream maker, it will just require a bit more patience and you’ll need to let it thaw a little before you try & scoop it out. I used an ice cream maker because it’s there so I might as well. So, grab all the ingredients (not the optional extras) and blend them together in your food processor or blender until smooth. Pour into your ice cream maker and let it do it’s thing. You can either eat it as soft serve straight from the ice cream maker or pop it in the freezer to set a little harder. If you are not using an ice cream maker, pour it into a container with a lid and freeze for 4-6 hours until scoopable. Top with any optional toppings. Enjoy.

almond espresso ice cream 1

Protein Chocolate (vegan. paleo. nut free)

I have a confession. I am eating waaaaayyyyy too many treats. Like seriously. Way. Too. Many. I ate all these chocolates in one day. That’s not a lie. I wish it was. Yeah they are ‘healthier’ than a Mars Bar but the whole lot!? In one day. I’ve gotta reel that $hit in. I wrote a post a while back about my take on HEALTHY TREATS and I still stand by that but, I know myself and I will end up in a full sugar-junkie tailspin if I don’t get a lid on this now. It’s time.

I am getting back to basics and am going to have a little sugar detox like the one I did HERE just to get me feeling back on track. I am going to get back into doing some regular INFRA-RED saunas at my chiropractor. I find these make my skin feel amazing, they help me unwind and calm myself and they are the perfect way to help relax tight muscles and detoxify. I wrote about the benefits of those bad boys a while ago but had to stop while I was pregnant & breast-feeding due their serious detoxing ability.

1/2 cup chopped cacao butter, melted
1/4 cup coconut oil (or ghee)
2 heaped tbs raw cacao
2-3 tbs rice malt syrup/maple syrup/honey (make them as sweet or bitter as you like)
2 tbs gelatin (Great Lakes collagen hydrolysate green canister) or protein powder (optional) I use ONLY NUTRITION brand
OPTIONAL- Few drops of peppermint oil (or orange oil)

Melt the cacao butter and coconut oil together then set aside to cool slightly. Add the cacao and mix well to ensure there are no lumps. Add remaining ingredients and whisk it all together until smooth. Pour into chocolate moulds or into a baking paper lined tray to set as a “bark” that you can break up once it has set. Place in the fridge for 3-4 hrs to set then just try and eat one piece. I dare you. Baby G managed to get her mits on one of these before I demolished the rest.

protein-choc-3

Choc Cranberry Protein Bombs (vegan, primal, clean eating, gluten free, dairy free)

There’s balls all over place. Where ever you look. Balls & more balls. All shapes, all flavours, some with nuts, some nut-free, some are loaded with protein. Everyone is on the ball-train and why the hell not? They are fast, delicious and a cracking snack on the go. So. Many. Balls. And ball jokes. Obviously I am talking about BLISS BALLS so let’s clean up this ball chat and go and make some shall we. Seriously, you lot need to get your minds out of the gutter.

1 cup cranberries (or dried berries of your choice)
1/2 cup nut butter (I used ABC, you can use tahini or coconut butter for a nut-free version)
1/2 cup ONLY NUTRITION raw choc protein (or protein of your choice. You could also use nut flour instead)
1/2-1 tsp fresh finely grated ginger
3 tbs coconut oil
1/2 cup hemp seeds/coconut/chia seeds

Mix all the ingredients together in a bowl until they all come together and your dough is ‘rollable’. Is that a word?

 

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Roll into any size ball that takes your fancy then pop them in the fridge to set for a couple of hours before demolishing. These store well in the fridge or freezer.

 

Hardcore Paleo Choc Crunch Ice Cream

As the name would suggest, this ice cream is hardcore. Like Vin Diesel. It’s for die hard chocolate lovers only. If you ‘kinda like chocolate’, forget it, go find yourself some beige flavour like vanilla and leave this to the real chocolate fiends. Don’t get all huffy that I just called vanilla flavour ‘beige’ either, I enjoy a good vanilla ice cream as much as the next person but let’s be real, vanilla ice cream ain’t gonna knock anyone’s socks off. Vanilla ice cream is like the Kristin Stewart of ice cream, it serves a purpose but it’s pretty boring to both look at and experience. Thank God vanilla ice cream isn’t as angsty or have that nasty bitchy resting face though. 

Onwards with the ice cream! 

500ml full fat coconut cream

200ml water

2 egg yolks

3-4 tbs raw cacao (depending on how chocolatey you like it)

2 tbs tapioca starch 

2 tbs honey, maple syrup or rice malt syrup (add more if you like it sweeter) 

1 cup Paleo Hero Choc Granola (or you could use some lightly toasted nuts or coconut) 

Blend or whisk together all the ingredients except the granola until smooth. Heat over a low heat, whisking constantly until it comes to a boil then remove from the heat and set aside to cool. Once cool, pop it in the fridge to chill completely. When it is completely cold, whack it in your ice cream maker, add the granola & let that bad boy work its magic. I then transferred ihe to the freezer for about an hour to make it more ‘scoopable’. If you don’t have an ice cream maker you could freeze it in silicone cupcake moulds and reblend in the food processor once frozen for a soft serve style ice cream. Dig in. 

Chocolate Bread

Here you go. The much anticipated moment you have been waiting for. In my opinion, it will have been worth the wait. This is freaking good gear. This bread could be made without the cacao if you didn’t want a chocolate bread…. But really, who doesn’t want chocolate bread? Weirdo’s, that’s who. If you are a weirdo who doesn’t want chocolate bread, we can’t be friends, but you can still adapt this recipe to suit your weirdo ways. Add a teaspoon of vanilla powder for vanilla bread or leave out the sweetener, add some fresh herbs & make a savory loaf.

This bread can be used otherwise in any which way you please. I’d suggest toasting it under the grill or in a sandwich press, smearing it with butter, ghee, coconut butter or nut butter, or any other splendid topping you like and shoving it swiftly in your pie hole before someone else does. It’ll be the quick or the dead with this bread around…. Well maybe not dead. But definitely sad & hungry. This was adapted from a recipe by AGAINST ALL GRAIN.

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Hot Choccy

It’s hot chocolate kinda weather today so here you go. Chocolate fiends pay attention NOW! On our recent trip overseas Trav & I became mildly addicted to Italian Hot Chocolate…. Trav more so than me, he even had a tantrum after we trekked halfway across Paris to get what someone online had touted as ‘Paris’ best hot chocolate’, only to find that the shop was no longer there. It’s was the kind of hot chocolate that you want to eat with a spoon it’s so thick but I am fairly certain it was NOT even slightly nourishing and loaded with sugar & God knows what else.

This version contains some awesome healthy fats, antibacterial, anti microbial & anti fungal properties from the coconut cream, a cracker dose of magnesium from the raw cacao & super dark chocolate & the gelatin provides a nice protein boost and is brilliant for the health of our skin, hair, nails, digestion, immune system & joints. It is like dessert in a mug.

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Figgy Coconut Balls

It’s a rainy old day here in Bris-Vegas & that means it’s perfect weather to get in the kitchen & make lots of food…. Despite how it may appear from my recipe ratio of sweets to actual food, I don’t just eat cake & chocolate all day…. Not all day.

Ever noticed that dried figs sometimes taste like some sort of booze? No, it’s not because I soaked them in booze….. Or because I was chowing down on them when I was already drunk. Huh? Just me? Weird thing to say? I totally think I can taste like brandy or port or something like that in dried figs? No? Whatever. These balls taste boozy to me, let me know if you get that too.

375g dried figs
200g shredded coconut (or 200g coconut butter)
3 tbs coconut oil
1/2 tsp vanilla powder (or 1tsp vanilla extract)
Dark chocolate for dipping, I used PANA CHOCOLATE

Pop the figs in a bowl and cover with hot water & allow to soak for 10mins. Drain off the water then add the figs & remaining ingredients, except chocolate to the food processor & blend until it all comes together. If it’s too wet add a little more coconut, too dry add a dash more oil. Melt your dark chocolate any way you like, roll the fig mix into balls, dunk in the chocolate to coat then place on a baking paper lined tray. Once all done, pop in the fridge to set. You can store these babies in the fridge or hide them from yourself in the freezer like I do. If you are feeling super lazy you can just press the fig mix into a tin & pour the chocolate on top like a slice. That’s probably what I will do next time because this ball-rolling-business is time consuming and messy…. On the plus side you do end up with lots of chocolate on your fingers that you get to lick off at the end. You decide.